I used to be paralyzed by fear. Like, I couldn’t move. I would sit in my car or house or at a coffee shop and not move.
I awoke this morning at 4:30, afraid of something…which I won’t go into specifically. But, it’s more like abandonment, moving on, letting go…all of those things.
I tossed for awhile, put on my running shoes, and did a 30 minute run on the schedule today. I prayed, and meditated, and realized that God is good, and all is right with the world, even if I don’t necessarily believe it. I have to trust that I’ve been brought this far without much effort on my part, and I won’t sink. House, job, divorce…all these things were running around in my chest and head.
I stopped at the top of the catwalk, which is where I go for cathartic screams, and I sobbed. At 6am, before the sun was up…and truckers are honking, and I am crying, and all is right with the world…because I was able to get it out.
…and that, my friends…is how running has saved my life. In more ways than I can count. Instead of paralyzing self analysis, I let my feet do the work…thank you.