…and so it came to pass.

The affair that leveled me six weeks ago…it no longer has the punch, the pow, the pain that it did. 

This I know:

  • Affairs are not about sex.  They are about feeling cared for.  Oh, and sex.
  • You can apologize over and over for the wrong done, but truly…time and changed behavior will tell the truth.
  • You can’t always get redemption from the people who need to give it to you.  When I confronted her, I said, “You can’t even say you’re sorry?”  No, no she couldn’t.  And yet, I still heal.
  • The people involved have to carry a burden all on their own, no matter how much they blame you.
  • That even if you go to church, profess to be a prayer warrior, and act holy, you can still be a bitch and sleep with other peoples’ husbands. 

This I did:

  • Laced up my shoes when I didn’t want to (after 2 weeks of no running)
  • I ran 20 miles, and for 2 of them, cursed and spit and slapped and punched
  • I started eating again, and not M&Ms.  Good stuff, like protein and carbs.
  • I held my head up in town, when I very well could have stayed in my house.
  • I realize that when this happens in a very small town, people want to know.  They do.  And then, one day no one cares about it anymore, thank God.

This is what I think about as I approach 9 days until Marathon.

  • If I can get through marathon training for six months, I can certainly walk through this nightmare…and I have, and I am.
  • I only have to run 26.2 miles next week.
  • I can do this.  I’m ready.  It’s not about the necklace or the time or the firemen.  It’s about completing the marathon…coming across the finish line.
  • I have wonderful Twitter, Blogger & Family & Friend peeps who supported this journey…both monetarily & emotionally.

Tears.  They are stopping, day by day.  Carry on.

Good luck to Chicago & Long Beach marathoners this weekend!!

4 thoughts on “Turning the corner

  1. like a marathon, life requires us to keep taking one step at a time. sometimes that one step is the best we can manage; but soon we unconsciously find ourselves running without effort. such is the saga of life (and running).

    turn that corner!!!

  2. You have hit upon something: “You can’t get redemption from the people who need to give it to you….”

    Really – honestly when it comes down to it. Even if they DO say the “right” words. You walk away going – “LIAR!” It doesn’t matter what those looking outside into your world think.

    You have to be OK with it all. And lets face it, when we keep coming back to gnaw on it, chew away at the irritation. We are whittling it down to something our minds can put up on that shelf, file it neatly, dust our hands together and – get ON with it.

    You don’t look over your shoulder when you run, you look forward. If we spent more time in our life looking forward we’d appreciate that view more.

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