I’m sitting here in Washington DC, in my friend’s apartment. I flew in on a redeye flight on Wednesday night/Thursday morning, and have been trying to acclimate myself to the EST situation. My internal clock says California, and I’m trying to stay awake…so I guess I should blog.
This has been an interesting few months. This marathon training cycle has been characterized by vertigo, broken toes, pre-menopause, whatever. It seems like every time I turned around, there was some new issue to deal with. But, not normal issues…weird ones. It was also the time that I no longer connected with my ex husband. We’ve really been at odds for some time now, so there has been no positive connection in awhile.
This training cycle has been characterized by one word: change.
I’ve lost a few good friends in my life. Someone who I have known and loved for many years, left a group of friends that I love. A few girls I’ve worked with in the program have gone their own ways. My ex husband is truly gone. A man or two whom I met and carried on with …gone. Mostly this training cycle, while running here and there and hitting and missing some runs..mostly this cycle has been about telling the truth. All the time.
And with that…I have gained some amazing people.
Tonight, I plan on dishing and dining with a whole handful of them at our Marine Corps Marathon tweetup. And then again tomorrow…to meet the people who live in the east, hang out, eat…and really connect on an organic level. So excited and very cool.
A man I knew 30 years ago has recently come into my life. I loved him like crazy as a young girl. He was the driving force in my early sobriety, and I can remember hours sitting with these 2 men who showed and taught me more about sobriety in the early days. One has passed away, but the other… this man…just recently showed up, like people have a way of doing. And I adore him. And we are older. Both sober. A friend I hope to have for a long time…at some point.
Tons of women I’ve met have become permanent fixtures in my daily life. Not just on Twitter, but moved to Instant Messaging, then text, then daily phone calls…then meeting at races. And now, I have a wealth of people that I love.
And, I have learned to tell the truth. When a relationship is over, I need to call it. Not wait for YOU to call it. When a friendship is at risk, I need to say it. No more elephants in the room. No more pretending that it will blow over. Because, sometimes, it doesn’t blow over…and you cover it up, and then one day someone wants to kill the other over spilled coffee.
In my family, my sons and I have a weekly family meeting. Each week someone takes a turn leading it. We all do a thumbs up and down for the week. We take turns talking to someone that we are upset with. We talk about real family issues. And no one gets in trouble for what they say. My 13 and 11 year old…and me. We have a ritual. We tell the truth.
And while it’s very easy to do in my family, it hasn’t always been easy to do it in my adult relationships.
Until now. Because telling the truth, while sometimes can be painful…is always the truth…and people know it whether or not you say it is so.
Washington DC: You are lovely. I’m on my way to your city this day, to explore…to meet…to eat…and to prepare for Sunday…for Marathon #3.