**No sir. You can kick me outta here, but I ain’t quitting.

I’m such a whiner.

Here I am with this foot, this stupid foot, and all I can think about is how much I like to eat, and how this foot is going to prevent me from filling my pie hole as much as I want. 

I’m essentially an *all or nothing* type.  Many students, friends and loves know this.  I am either 0 or 100mph.  I have been known to actually get high off of too much chocolate.  I went through a period of obsessing with all things knitting…This is with everything I do.  So, for me, running was a way to manage the food love affair…  I eat, I run, I lose weight.   FABULOUS!

I suddenly realized that there are MANY of you, (Dare to Tri, for one) who have actual weather conditions that prevent you from running.  SNOW.  If I lived in snow, I’d never run.  Yet, folks like Viper, et al have a plan…they have snow.  They deal with it.  Me?  I’d wallow in my own self pity and blog about it until, well, Spring.

So, thank you I’ll Run For Donuts guy, for emailing me about my foot.  Thanks to all of you for keeping me motivated.  I’m not running today.  I hope to run sometime.  Maybe sooner than later. 

It’s 79 degrees here in California.  All my windows are open.  I don’t have inclement weather.  My foot will heal, and then I’ll be back.  I swear.  I have to.  Until then, it’s backing off the pasta carb love that I got goin’.  I’ll be watching everyone from the sidelines…

I just spent the day in Professional Development.  That must be the reason I’m so hopeful.  Sitting around is not my style.  Not. At. All.

**From An Officer And A Gentleman.

Stages of Grief

What Are The Stages of Grief?

Here are the identified five stages that a person with Plantar Fasciitis experiences when informed of their prognosis.

  • Denial (this isn’t happening to me!)  I have finally found an exercise plan that really works for me.  It helps keep my weight in check.  I feel powerful when I run.  When I finish.  When I went shoe shopping this last time, the guy at Fleet Feet *mentioned* that he thinks I might have Plantar Fasciitis.  I had never even heard about it.  Actually, I thought how COOL I have a runner’s injury that is TREATABLE, and will go away soon!
  • Anger (why is this happening to me?)  What’s that you say doc?  I’m supposed to NOT run last week.  “Yes, you can get as much aerobic benefit from walking as running.”   Really?  Really?  You are so full of shit!  You canNOT get the same, otherwise, we’d all be walking.  And, um.  We’re not.  I’m so mad.  I buy a Strassberg Sock.  I wear it faithfully!  I roll my foot back and forth on an ice bottle.  I take Alleve religiously!  WHY WHY WHY?
  • Bargaining (I promise I’ll be a better person if…)  Okay, look.  If I walk this week, I can train as if this is all a dream, right?  I have the Fresno Half Marathon in November!  It’s the INAGURAL Marathon!!! PLUS!!!  The Two Cities Marathon has been added to the popular 7th annual Trail of 2 Cities Half Marathon and both are true World Class Events! This event has it all! Boston qualifier, prize money, finisher’s sweatshirt, brilliant autumn foliage, hot breakfast and the signature ice cream sundae!   Okay, if I don’t have the sundae, I will promise I will be good.  PLEASE!
  • Depression (I don’t care anymore) (Two nights ago).  I lay in my bed.  Tears streaming down my face.  I know I have to meet Kim in the morning for 4.5.  I can’t do it.  I can’t even walk.  I can’t have the MRI, because, God knows, I FREAK OUT in those tubes.  What will happen to me?  I have to run!  I don’t care.  If I can’t run, I’ll eat.  But OMG I’ll be back in the same boat.  This is so sad sad sad!!!  I’m getting a divorce, and running was SAVING MY EMOTIONAL ASS!  What will I do???
  • Acceptance (I’m ready for whatever comes) I meet Kim at 5am in front of my house.  I limp to our starting place, 1/4 mile from my house.  I tell her I can’t.  That I may have to give it up.  I map out her 4.5, and tell her I’ll be waiting for her at the bottom of the catwalk.  That I’ll walk.  I will.   She takes off.  I look up and yell, “KIM!”  She has her iPod on…she doesn’t hear me.   I RUN ANYWAY.

slow ride. take it easy. *yawn*

My doctor told me that I am to walk tomorrow.  Walk.  Normally, I would have thought, “Hey alright.  I don’t have to run.”  Me?  I’m restless, irritable and discontented at the thought of walking for 30 minutes.  On a treadmill.

Oddly, my foot feels much better, which of course says to me that I must run.  It was hard watching Kim take off Tuesday morning for our 4 miler, while I went on the recumbant (sp?) bike at the gym.  I literally had my eyes closed and was practically snoring after 30 minutes.  I burned 37 calories.  Yeah, it was a hoot.

5K on Saturday, and dang it’s getting cold here in CA.  80 today tops, breezy and chilly.  It’s 63 now.  Time to break out the flannel.

I passed several kids I should have failed this session.  Friday, report cards come out.  I just looked at this one kid, T., and I said, “Don’t you want an A or a B?”  His response? 

Nope, I want the lowest possible grade, and still be able to pass.  I don’t want extra credit.  I don’t want a high GPA.  I want to pass and get the hell outta here.  Don’t trip.”

I’m trippin’.